Tuesday, 5 June 2012

All in the role of a dice


This blog has stemmed from a friend of mine getting the go ahead for her double lung transplant. Jess has been greatly in need for far too long and was in desperate need of that life saving call.

10 months ago I received what was to be a call that didn’t just save my life it transformed it completely, I can do things that I could never do before and I will always be grateful and in debt to my donor and her family.

That night whilst anxiously waiting at the Freeman Hospital for news as to whether my transplant would go ahead or whether I would be going home again I was sat on the bed gowned up and ready to go looking at face book and I’d had a reply to my status about been prepped for theatre etc . It was Jess who had replied, she said she was also at the freeman on the other ward. Turned out we had both been called, now I always knew that there were two people called at any one time for a transplant, just incase there was a problem such as raised infection markers or you were running a fever in which case you’d be deemed unsuitable at that point.

Thing was when I realised it was Jess it added into the already massive mix of emotions, we were from the same CF unit, she was desperate as was I, but she is also so much younger than I am and I know they say you can suffer from survivors guilt after your transplant but guilt set in as soon as Jess had told me that she was running a temperature so had been sent home, I began to think that she in fact should have been having her transplant that night.

It prayed on my mind right up until Kirsty my transplant coordinator came in and told me it was all systems go then the whole “ok I'm about to go have a double lung transplant” apprehension kicked in.

It wasn’t until I’d fully recovered in ITU and was moved to a normal ward and caught up with the outside world or should I say world of face book that it again began to weigh heavy on my mind, I constantly kept up to date with Jess and how she was doing and prayed that she would get her call and soon.

I think (not sure) that shortly after all of this Jess had another false call. I felt completely discouraged and sad for Jess and thought it really is like the “role of a dice” anyone little thing and your whole future is left hanging in the balance.

So I cannot describe the elation, the relief that I felt for Jess when on Monday she finally received that call and got the go ahead. It was third time lucky for Jess just as it was for me. I hear that Jess is doing really well and is now breathing for herself and is smiley and trying to talk. It’s amazing, the team at the freeman hospital are fabulous and she’s in the best hands!

So this blog is for Jess, you got there lovely lady welcome to the rest of your life... Thinking of and thanking your donor and their family.

Perhaps now I can put aside those feelings of guilt that I had for Jess.

Thinking of you Hun and wishing you a smooth, speedy recovery, but remember slow and steady wins the race.

Haven’t signed the Organ Donor Register? Why not?

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